I found out yesterday that my friend A died. Four hours later I attended his funeral. I have other blogs and places that I use to publish things for our small group or family, but I've been longing for a place for me to just simply write. It's my best outlet. A has been on my mind constantly and I am wishing to tell him many things.
God has been teaching me so much lately about grief that I need to start compiling my thoughts a bit better.
More later...
A,
I'm not sure how, but I just wanted to say thank you for your friendship...
I was remembering back in 1999 when I was the only girl out at the Refinery with the Patinting crew, and how terrified I was to be in this tiny break trailer with all these dirty smelly guys.
You were the very first one who actually talked to me and made me feel comfortable out there. During the ENDLESS hours of Hole Watch you and a few of the other guys would venture out and talk and laugh with me, keeping me on my toes, but helping me to feel welcome.
When I finally got to try some "real work" and push brooms around and what not, we all seemed to have enough humor amongst us to have a pretty good time (my sides would be sore from all the laughter). I remember you and J finally convincing me to try a teeny tiny piece of chew which I tried very hard to take like a man (if you remember I failed miserably and I haven't tried it since). You and M taught me never ever under any circumstances to bring a banana in my lunch.
We would take these ridiculously long smoke breaks visiting every smoke shack in the plant talking about everything from fishing to marriages and once I was a mom, you gave me heads up on the adventures I was in store for.
Remember how we would all huddle in the break room when it was raining and you and M taught me the art of the "rain hard enough so that we can go home and claim unemployment" dance?
You showed me how to hold a paintbrush PROPERLY, and how to mix paint. But most importantly, you showed me how to thoroughly enjoy my summers spent covered in dirt, taping off washers, sandblasting in the incredible heat of the old boneyard. You taught me sumo wrestling in the "coliseum", some very sparky spark testing, overcoming fear of heights, and learning to be "One of the Guys." I know I was never all that good at that job, but I also know it was some of the best fun I have ever had while working, thanks to you.
Even after I left Painting, whenever I saw you at the Refinery, you would wave to me in the parking lot and fill me in on all the of latest gossip.
I will really miss seeing you there. Even though the refinery isn’t a very aesthetically pleasing place to be, you sure brightened it up and made it enjoyable. Someone once told me that it is our friends who make up who we are. All the memories of our experiences with those around us become a part of who we are and then on to all who we meet. You will be missed very very much, but shared with many forever.
So thank you A, I will never forget the adventures and laughs and life lessons. I hope that I can someday be the friend you were to me, for someone else. Save me a spot up there and I'll see you when it’s my turn…
AJ
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